While we are still on the subject of Disney movies and Disney princesses (well, at least I still am, since I’ve been mentioning Disney in my past two blogs), allow me to share this short dialogue I just had with Alyanna:

ALYANNA: “Mom, why is Princess Jasmine wearing a shirt that’s too short for her? She’s showing her tummy and belly button. Why??”

ME: “OO nga noh?? You know Alyanna, maybe she doesn’t even realize that what she’s wearing is NOT appropriate, or maybe she forgot to add more cloth to her shirt that’s why there’s not enough to cover her whole body. What do you think?”

ALYANNA: “Mom, when we go back to Disneyland Hongkong we have to look for Princess Jasmine and tell her to buy more cloth so she can cover her tummy and belly button, okay mom? Don’t forget ha?”

Whew! I’m glad she didn’t start to connect that Jasmine’s supposed to be the daughter of the very wealthy sultan and should therefore be able to have anything at her disposal— including the right set of clothes….

Buti pa ang bata, marunong manamit! :)

PS: I walked into our room one morning (this was last week), and Alyanna started singing “I can open your eyes, take you wonder by wonder….” with matching hand gestures— again, in her sleep! :D

I’m reminded of three scenarios that took place a couple of months ago, when Alyanna was still three-something years old. I took them to memory but never got around to blogging about them. I shall do that now, as I know it will be a good reminder for me (and hopefully to you, too) of just how much our children long for role models.

Part one:

There was a time (even before she turned three) that Alyanna got introduced to Connie Talbot, the six-year old singer who won on the show Britain’s Got Talent (*a reader just corrected me, Connie was just runner-up, not winner hehe,my mistake). Since then, Alyanna’s love for singing grew to a whole new level. She would sing in the car, while eating, before going to bed, in her sleep….everywhere, anywhere…everytime, anytime. She was so fond of this six-year old that she would sometimes call herself Connie Talbot or Alyanna Talbot, and would always wear boots (even here at home) because she thought that the boots would make her look like Connie. Why, she didn’t even allow me to get her a haircut because “Connie Talbot has long hair“.

This was also the season when Alyanna dreaded vegetables. One time, while we were having broccoli and cauliflower for dinner, Alyanna asked me what they were and I answered her, telling her to eat them. Before that time, she would just say no to eating veggies at the sight of anything green, but when I mentioned to her what those two kinds were, her eyes lit up as she asked, “what? CONNIE-flower?? Is this Connie Talbot’s favorite??” At that instant I saw a glimmer of hope that maybe— just maybe I can use this to get her to eat the healthy green stuff. I said “yep! Connieflower! And yes, maybe they’re Connie Talbot’s favorite….oh look! we even have little connietrees!!” (I know, I was pushing it :) ) ….I did have victory that day. :)

Part two:

After the Connie Talbot season was the season of the Von Trapp family. Alyanna just LOVED the Sound of Music! So much so that we even caught her singing “Lonely Goatherd” one morning, in her sleep. During this season, she would usually ask me “Do the kids in the Sound of Music like that?” or  “Do the kids in Sound of Music do that?” whenever I’d ask her to do something.

Part three:

After Maria and the Von Trapps, came Disney. She actually has never scene a full Disney movie (to the extent of my knowledge). Most of the time we just play the parts with the singing (those scenes we thought were safe enough) or play the soundtrack to her. Even then, somehow she still got the prince-princess concept, which I have been trying to avoid. I was surprised when one day, as I was carrying her down the stairs as one would carry an overgrown baby, she asked me, “Mom, diba this is how a prince carries a princess??” And one time when Dennis asked to kiss her, she said, “Ok, you be the prince and I’m the princess, daddy!” Ayayay!! And we’ve never even shown her any of those “…and they lived happily ever after” parts yet!

Children are always on the look-out for role models. God wired them that way. However, at a young age, they do not really have enough discernment to decide which would be a good model to follow. It is OUR duty, as parents, to provide that filter for them in the meantime. More than filtering, God has given us the responsibility to be the good models for them to follow. This means that if I am to parent my children well, then I’d have to live my life well.

I can’t believe February is about to come to an end. I don’t want to say this just for the sake of saying it, but again the sentimental Thammie is acting up a little and I just have to say…time sure flies! *sigh*

Anyway, since March is just around the corner, I think it’s about time that I make it official and report to you that Mikaela has been OFFICIALLY, COMPLETELY weaned. That’s right! W-E-A-N-E-D…..and I did not have to resort to our dreaded last resort! :D yay! Talk about success! hehe :)

I know… this report was supposed to come sometime during the first or second week of this month when Mika turned two. I tried, really– but there were days that after two days or so of being “successful”, I’d get her and volunteer her most-loved question, “Mika, would you like to drink mommy’s milk?” (while flashing a big grin). Of course, what was I to expect from this two-year-old? No less than complete compliance! :D I’m smiling now just thinking about it, how I got to nurse her again. ;) )

….But enough of that. As I was reporting, it’s been more than a week with no relapses whatsoever so now I am confident to say that I have overcome and Mika is now officially a kid. I don’t know how long it will be before I would start to look for another baby to cuddle, but I know now’s not yet the time for that. I shall borrow other people’s babies for the meantime. :D

PS: Please check my blog on weaning to see what worked for me :)

Monday is Dennis’ day off. It is also the day we have “set apart” for our date. Sometimes we could have the whole day to ourselves, while there are times we would have to spend the day with the girls and go on a date at night. This is really why i look forward to Mondays every week– I can’t wait to spend quality time with the love of my life. :)

Yesterday, however, we had to stay home since Mika is down with terrible cough and cold and is pretty clingy. She is now like a baby koala stuck to me, or could look like a joey if I had used my sling. Oh, we did get to go out for two hours, though. :) Dennis really wanted to take me somewhere we both loved and so he did while the kids were taking a nap. The rest of the day was pretty much very…typical, as one would put it, given that all we did was just stay at home, play, eat, and watch a Disney movie (note to self: Aladdin is a pretty scary cartoon…and I mean pretty scary not just for kids!!). On a side note there, I am proud to say I still know the songs and some lines of the movie even though it’s been eons since I’ve last seen it. :D

As I was saying, yep– yesterday’s family day was somewhat ordinary. Ordinary yet fun… I noticed that Dennis and I kept laughing at ourselves and each other’s jokes throughout the day yesterday. I like how we got to just laugh and laugh without thinking of chores or work. I love how I could still laugh with my best friend, and of course, not just on Mondays. I pray we’d never lose that– even after two more kids in the future. :)

PS: I think it’s about time we change the meaning of “manic Mondays” by the way. :)

Dennis and I have both agreed that it is time we teach Alyanna some basic principles about Money. We started exposing her to the concept of money and saving money when she turned three by giving her a piggy bank that had three divisions– one for giving/tithing, one for saving, and another for spending. Though we knew she didn’t really get the point yet, that was fine. The goal at that time was just to point out that the money we get is not all for spending. OR maybe we just wanted to show her that in this life, we need money in order to be able to acquire stuff…and for that to happen, we needed to save. Well, that was Dennis’ goal,really. Mine was more on “This is money. In this life, we get to use this. For now, you just have to practice your fine motor skills (practice c/o how she held the coins with her fingers) and your eye-hand coordination (by learning how to shoot the coin through the small hole)…in preparation for writing.” :)

Since Alyanna turned four this month, we decided to take it to the next level. We  decided that it is time to teach her that money is earned. It is something one has to work for. It doesn’t, as they say, grow on trees…nor does it grow out of our nostrils when we sneeze. (Let me just put a smiley here, the rhyme amused me.:) )

Now where was I? Oh, yes– One has to work for money. Being a child doesn’t mean that she can avoid certain responsibilities. There are things that she is already capable of doing–be that on her own, or with a little  help from the grown-ups. What is important to us is that she shows initiative to help and take responsibility for certain things around the house already.

We have this kit from Bookworm.ph (eep! shameless plug here, but what can I do?? I wouldn’t want an opportunity lost :) ) which we started using to help achieve this goal. It is Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace Junior. We love it because it is really a kid-friendly version of what we have been implementing in our household in terms of budgeting and the stewardship of money.

So far so good. Alyanna has been loving the one-peso coins we give her every time she does chores around the house. Simple, age-appropriate chores such as fixing her bed, helping place the plates on the dining table, and sweeping the floor with her mini broom. There are also fines she has to pay whenever she fails to do what she’s supposed to. In our case, we would have to subtract from her “commission” when she would whine, since that’s what we’re working on with her behavior now. We have noticed that since we started it, she has been going out of her way to help out around the house, and has improved in the area of self-control. Another plus is that whenever she asks us to buy something for her at the mall, I just tell her to save up for it with the commission she gets from doing her chores. :)

It’s never too early to teach our children to be good stewards of the blessings that God gives us. It is never too early to teach them responsibility. I believe that as we train them in these areas early on, we are taking small yet significant steps that would set them up for a lifetime of success. :)

Now…if I could just get more one-peso coins…

check out the FINANCIAL PEACE JR KIT, click here to purchase

I was joyfully playing with Mika when I got alarmed upon hearing a somewhat-familiar loud cry. It was the kind that was a mix of a loud scream– depicting shock, and a very loud cry of frustration and fear. That voice was all too familiar and I knew it came from the kitchen. My heart skipped a beat. Something had happened to Alyanna; She needed me.

Of course, as any parent would have responded, I dropped what I was doing and immediately ran to the kitchen where Alyanna was. When I got there, I saw Alyanna in front of the water container (you know, that big blue square-shaped container we get from the water stations that we get refilled everytime?)– she was surrounded by a pool of water on the floor, had a small breakable cup in her hands, tears flowing down her cheeks, and a distressed look on her face. She had tried getting water by herself (which she has successfully done before) but couldn’t turn it off. She had turned the knob too much and now it was like water flowing from a faucet, only there was no drain or sink to catch it. There was only a small cup that got filled too quickly, and Alyanna just froze and panicked.

I imagine if that would have been Mika in her place, I would have witnessed a totally different scenario. I would have heard a loud “WHEEE!!” and would have seen Mika lying on the floor, pretending to be in a swimming pool. Mika’s that way…totally different from her older sister… totally different from me.

I totally understand Alyanna’s reaction to the whole thing. I think I myself would have responded the same way if I was her age. Even at that time, my initial reaction was “Aaarrgh!!! what happened??! what have you done???!?” –but of course, that was all in my head. I knew better. And so I calmly told Alyanna “That’s okay love.” But Alyanna wouldn’t respond. She was too frustrated with herself she just stood there and refused to move even as I tried to get her to step away from  the slippery floor.

I told her again that it really was okay and that we needed to move so we could mop the floor. She just stared at the pool of water. Then I asked her  “What happened? You didn’t get to turn it off in time?” She nodded her head yes.

“Are you scared?” She just looked at me, no response.

“Are you frustrated?” Once again, she nodded.

I decided to try something so  anti-thammie– I decided to add to the mess and “waste” more water, just to show her that it was all okay and that the world has not stopped just because of what happened. I got the small cup from her hand, drank from it, turned the knob on so that a lot of water flowed out, filled the cup with water, and let it overflow again. Water kept flowing down the floor for a few more seconds. Alyanna just stared at me, in shock…and then turned to look at the cup again. Just as I knew her, she knew me. She knew I didn’t like the mess, and she very well knew how I didn’t like being wasteful. She looked confused. Then I said to her, “Alyanna, sometimes accidents like these happen, and it’s okay. You’re okay. No need to panic. You’re all right.” Then I motioned for her to come try turn the knob. She did…and was able to. I saw the immediate change in her face. She felt in-control again. She was okay again. The world hasn’t stopped after all. Everything was back to normal. :)

Got this from Ptr. Bernard Marquez. Thought it would be nice to share this with all of you especially on this day of love and mush.  :)

100 Ways You Can Love Your Husband HIS Way

Author Unknown

Your relationship can be
greatly strengthened as you use these suggestions.

1. Respectfully communicate with him.
2. Let him know he’s important to you
3. Purposefully try to understand his feelings—even when you disagree with
him.
4. Show interest in his friends giving him some time with them if they’re
trust-worthy.
5. Let go of the small stuff. We all have annoying habits and preferences
that are different from our spouse’s. (Dave Ramsey)
6. Tell him you both love him AND like him.
7. Either show interest in his hobbies or allow him space to participate
freely. (Dave Ramsey)
8. Protect his dignity on a daily basis.
9. Be tender with him realizing he has feelings also.
10. Foster an atmosphere of laughter in your home. Look for ways to laugh
together.
11. Try not to make sudden major changes without discussion and giving him
time to adjust.
12. When you go out on a date together don’t bring up problems—have fun
instead.
13. Focus on what he’s doing right, instead of focusing so often on the
negatives.
14. Show interest in what he feels is important in life.
15. Give him special time with you apart from the children.
16. Recognize that the first few minutes after a spouse comes home often
sets the stage for how the rest of the evening will go. So try to make
the first few minutes a positive experience. (And then ease into the
negative if it’s necessary.)
17. Give him half an hour to unwind after he gets home from work. Your
evenings will be much more enjoyable. (Dave Ramsey)
18. Don’t allow any family member to treat him disrespectfully. Be the one
to defend him to any family member that dishonors his place as your
husband.
19. Compliment him often.
20. Be creative when you express your love, both in words and in actions.
21. Talk with him about having specific family goals for each year to work
on to achieve together so you will both feel closer to each other as a
marital team.
22. Don’t over commit yourself. Leave time for him.
23. Extend God’s grace to him and be forgiving when he offends you.
24. Find ways to show him you need him.
25. Give him time to be alone. (This energizes him to reconnect at other
times.)
26. Admit your mistakes; don’t be afraid to be humble. Peel away your
pride.
27. Defend him to those who disrespectfully talk about him. Remember that
love protects (1 Corinthians 13:7).
28. Respect his desire to do well—not his performance.
29. Rub his feet or neck, or scratch his back after a hard day.
30. Take time for the two of you to sit and talk calmly (schedule it when
necessary).
31. Initiate going out on romantic outings (when he’s not tired).
32. Email him when he’s at work, telling him how much you love him.
33. Surprise him with a fun gift of some kind that he’d really enjoy.
34. Express how much you appreciate him for working so hard to support the
family.
35. Tell him how proud you are of him for who he is (giving him specific
reasons).
36. Give advice in a loving way — not in a nagging or belittling way.
37. Help your husband to be the Spiritual head at home (without “lording”
it over him).
38. Reserve some energy for him so you’re not so tired when he wants you
sexually.
39. Don’t expect him to do projects beyond his natural capabilities.
40. Pray for him to enjoy God’s best in life.
41. Take special notice for what he has done for you and the family.
42. Brag about him to other people both in front of him and even when he’s
not there.
43. Share your feelings with him at appropriate times (but keep it brief
when he’s tired—sometimes men can feel “flooded” by too many words).
44. Tell him 3 things you specifically appreciate about him.
45. Honor him in front of the children (differ respectfully in private
when necessary).
46. Give him time to unwind for a little while after he comes home from
work. Arrange ahead of time to take your “time out”, giving him a few
minutes with the children.
47. Get up with him, even when he gets up earlier than you want to and
pray with him. (Hopefully you can go back to sleep afterwards. If not,
it’s a sacrifice worth making.)
48. Be his “help-mate” in whatever ways you sense he needs it.
49. Do some shoulder-to-shoulder activities with him (like watching a
movie or taking a drive together) without talking. Sometimes men just
like to BE with you and not talk.
50. Be a student of his ways so you show your love in ways he best
comprehends it.
51. When your husband is in a bad mood give him time to recover. Don’t
crowd him.
52. Help him to finish his goals, hobbies, or education when your see he
needs it.
53. Treat him as if God has stamped on his forehead: “Handle With Care.”
54. Work to get rid of habits that annoy him.
55. Be kind and thoughtful to his relatives. Don’t make him choose between
you.
56. Don’t compare his relatives with yours in a negative way.
57. Thank him for things he’s done around the house. (It means a lot to
men).
58. Don’t expect credit for all you do for him. Do it as “unto the Lord.”
59. Make sure he agrees with everything important that you’re planning to
do.
60. Do little things for him— let him sleep in, bring him coffee and/or
breakfast in bed, etc.
61. Don’t belittle his intelligence or be cynical in your words with him.
62. Initiate sex periodically. And respond more often.
63. Sometimes let him enjoy his day off work without having to “work” at
home.
64. Get to the point in your discussions. Spare him details unless he
wants them.
65. Discover his sexual needs.
66. Surprise him with a 15 second kiss when he gets home from work.
67. Wink at him from across the room when you’re out at a group function.
68. Give him the benefit of the doubt when he mis-speaks.
69. Don’t quarrel over words.
70. Be kind and courteous with him. (Don’t be kinder to strangers than to
him.)
71. When things go wrong, instead of assessing blame, focus on how to do
better.
72. As a kindness, don’t say, “I told you so.”
73. Try not to argue over money. Peacefully discuss future expenditures
instead.
74. Take him out on dates—pre-planning all of the details ahead of time.
75. Hold his hand and snuggle up close to him at times both at home and in
public.
76. Praise his good decisions; minimize the bad ones.
77. Tell him you love him more often.
78. Put love notes in his pockets and brief case.
79. Sit with him while he’s watching TV—even if the program doesn’t
interest you.
80. Don’t expect him to read your mind. (Family’s are spared grief when a
husband isn’t required to read their wife’s mind despite the fact that
the wife thinks he should.)
81. Periodically, give him time with his family alone.
82. Check with him before you throw away his papers and stuff. (He may
view them as more important than you realize.)
83. Work to keep yourself in shape in every way.
84. Let him express himself freely, without fear of being called stupid or
illogical.
85. Carefully choose your words. Remember to “speak the truth in LOVE.”
86. Don’t criticize him in front of others—keeping his dignity in tact.
87. Visit his childhood home with him.
88. When you’re angry, express it in respectful ways. Don’t give the
silent treatment.
89. Pray for him.
90. Make him homemade soup when he’s sick.
91. Look your best—dress to honor him and make him proud to be seen with
you.
92. Support him when someone tries to put him down. Be his best cheer
leader.
93. Don’t disagree with him in front of the children.
94. Take him for a weekend get-away without the children.
95. Cheer his successes whether in business or in other areas of everyday
living.
96. Graciously teach him how to demonstrate his love for you.
97. Give him coupons to redeem—maybe for a back scratch or a shoulder rub.
98. Buy him a gift certificate to his favorite lunch spot and put it in
his wallet.
99. Hide notes for him around the house where only he will find them.
100. Thank him for just being himself.

—- There! HAPPY VALENTINES DAY everyone! :)

Since the beginning of February, I’ve been literally counting the days before Mika turns two. That’s two days from now. *sigh* …I wrote in my previous blog how I planned to wean Mika, and I remember promising to give an update on how it turns out– whether or not I’ve had to resort to the last option. So here is my update:

So far so good. I haven’t found the need to do that thing that I dread. For the past few weeks (more significantly, last few days) I’ve been doing all the things I said I would, like not spend so much time in our favorite nursing spots, amuse Mika with other activities, give her other yummy (yet still healthy) options, and dropping certain feeding times. The last part is a little tricky though— I would drop a feeding at a certain time but would feed her the next day. Inconsistent is the word to describe my attempts in this respect. Truthfully speaking, I know that although Mika would cry and give me that “mommy-why-are-you-torturing-me” look most of the time, she would eventually stop and get the point. The problem is that I, the mommy, can’t resist and I so easily miss and long for our nursing moment.

I can imagine most of you are nodding your heads and can very well relate to that separation anxiety that I am telling you about. This makes it all the more difficult for us moms to overcome this feeling, knowing someone is there to empathize with us. BUT, to those who are seriously considering weaning their little cuties, I would say I have news for you: it is possible! It is possible to overcome our emotions after all! :)   I am proud to say that today, I was able to do it. Yes, the whole day Mika drank from the cup. Much of this I would attribute to my busy schedule today so I really had no time to feed her even if I wanted to. But tonight was the real test. Oh, how I wanted to say yes as she cried and take her into my arms and cuddle her and nurse her….but I was able to stop myself, tell her plainly “no more milk from mommy tonight Mika” and kiss her goodnight. Just like that. She said (in a sad but yielding tone), “no more milk? *pause* oh-tay…” Then off to bed she went. :)

Good girl Mika. Good job Mommy. (hehe!) :)

Dennis and I just celebrated our fifth wedding anniversary the other day (February 5). I realized two things: For a couple of years now, we haven’t been giving each other “anniversary” gifts; and we always have to include eating at a buffet in our date or else it wouldn’t be complete. :) This time around, we went to Clark to celebrate our anniversary together with another couple-friend who also happen to have the same anniversary. We also brought the kids with us to celebrate Mika’s birthday. Of course, as one would think, this cannot be it. How could you possibly celebrate an anniversary with kids around??…and with no buffet?? ….well, we’re not done yet. We would be staying overnight somewhere, just the two of us, next week…and I shall eat all the salmon I want the next day. :D

I asked Dennis if he noticed the same thing, by the way….the no-anniversary gift part, and he said he did, too. As we talked about it, we both realized how content we are with just spending time with each other. Really. If he were to ask me what I wanted to receive for our anniversary, I would honestly just say…. “take me to a buffet.” And if I were to ask him what he wanted as a gift for our anniversary, he wouldn’t have anything in mind (except, of course, what all husbands have in mind—but that’s a given).

And so I conclude, I am actually giving Dennis a gift — a gift that perhaps most men would want from their wives…the gift of not having to worry about giving gifts, and the gift of not having to think about how much his wife will be spending. In short, peace of mind. :D   What a rare gift these days!

Seriously though, I am very, very grateful for the five wonderful years we’ve had together. I know I can say that I love Dennis more now than how I did five years ago, and with God’s grace, I know I would learn to love him more and more each day in the years to come. I know we have yet to learn many things. I am just glad that I need not be anxious about anything, knowing that for one, it is God who is the center of our marriage, and it is He who will direct our paths; And second, that I will be going through this life-long learning process with my husband. I am so blessed to have a husband who I can trust, whose wisdom is way beyond his experience, who loves God more than he loves me, who is committed to loving me and taking care of his family, whose hard work is  always fruitful, who balances me more than he knows.

In the five years we’ve had together, I think we’ve learned more than the typical five-year couple. For one, God uses other couples who have gone ahead of us to mentor us and teach us. This has spared us from a lot of unnecessary fights and arguments, and has given us a lot of great ideas on how we should treat each other. Also, we have counseled so many couples (SO.MANY. especially since we started the Greenhills church)— younger and older than us— that constantly remind us what to prioritize in our marriage, and of course what to avoid. We also come out of every counseling session thanking each other and thanking God for being in control of us and our union.

Again I say, I am very, very grateful for the five wonderful years we’ve had together, and I am really looking forward to the years ahead. Many told me before that I should have waited and not get married at such a young age, but honestly, I am glad I was given this privilege of starting such an amazing life with my husband early on….and so I also get the chance to build more great memories with my family. :)

Ga, thank you for kidnapping me and making me quit med school. Thank you for making me realize  dreams for my life that I didn’t know I had. More importantly, thank you for making those dreams a reality (well, some are still dreams, but we’ll get there ;) ). Thank you for being my best friend and life-long partner. I am excited to see what God has in store for us in the coming years! :) I love co-laboring with you in serving God and in raising our family. It is pure joy.  I love you! :)

PS: Life-long partner– I really like the sound of that. :)

I love books. A book is actually one of the few things that I wouldn’t really mind spending for. As long as I have a good book with me, I become the most patient person in line or whenever I would have to wait for someone. As long as I get to read something worthwhile, I feel I am the most productive human being. :)

Books have played a big part in the history of mankind. Books have shaped people’s lives and have helped mold people’s characters since the beginning of time (well, since they came into existence in one form or another). Books have made it possible, and are continuing to do so, for one person to be able to speak into the lives of millions who may be continents away. Books have been and forever will be one of the most influential and powerful tools that have been made known to man. :)

To me, books = learning = value. ;)

I hope you get to read one today. :)

P.S: Check out this booklover’s treat