Took the girls to Active Fun today. For some reason, we don’t usually think about bringing them there, though we know that it is a good place for them to have fun, considering since we have a serious need for more kid-friendly places here in Metro Manila.

I know most of you have an idea what this play place looks like, but for the sake of those who don’t…

As you can see, the set-up really encourages the kids to run around,be active, explore, go wild, and play.

This was Mika’s idea of going wild and being adventurous:

First 15 minutes…

After half an hour….

An hour after….time’s up!

I should take them to these “active” places more often. I guess these places need some getting used to. :)

Is it just me or do days go by that fast?? I mean this day, in particular… why do I feel like I was not as productive as I would have intended? I’m now assessing how I spent the day and why I feel that I didn’t get to accomplish as much as I would have wanted. Was I moving too slow? Did my brain hang most of the time? I’m sure it wasn’t from oversleeping, since I actually lack sleep…Or maybe that’s just it?! I have not been sleeping well enough to make me as productive as a well-rested Thammie could be.

I know we’ve been taught during our growing up years to get eight hours of sleep at least. I have a confession: since becoming a mom, deep down I feel that I could do more if I just subtract a few hours from the recommended eight and that’s what I’ve been doing lately. I usually end up feeling some kind of guilt if I do get to sleep for eight hours. I didn’t realize this until….now. Somehow I’ve been telling myself that if I get to wake up early and sleep late, imagine all the things I can do with all those hours awake!— even if it means that I’ve been running on this the past few weeks:

* if you can’t read the fine print, suffice it to say that this just happens to be a very strong kind of UCC coffee :)

(Well, it could also be that I am just trying to give myself an excuse to be able to drink coffee….so I can pair it with a piece of cake…but that’s a whole different psychology I would rather not get into!)

Anyway, just tonight I came across some articles on the importance of sleep. As much as I would like to expound on this topic, it is already past midnight so I would have to say…goodnight!!! :)

PS: I would give you links to sites that talk about the importance of sleep, but that would mean that I’d end up sleeping much much later than it already is, so you can just Google it. ;) ….or maybe tomorrow I can work on it…we’ll see. :)

I’ve set Tuesday as my M&M day–my “Me” day and my “Ministry” day (hmmm….now that I think about it, it wouldn’t hurt to actually include eating M&M’s on this particular weekday :D ). Basically, it is the day I have set for anything that has nothing to do with household concerns nor has anything to do with the kids. Also, if I have to meet other wives or moms, I’d prefer to meet with them on this particular day so that the rest of the week, I can focus on all the things I have to do at home— uninterrupted. Well, that is my intention. Ideally, that is what’s supposed to happen. BUT, since the time that I have set this M&M day (which was at the start of the year), almost everyday/night I find myself having to set aside housework and the kids to talk to someone, either in person, through phone, or via the internet. Aside from that, even on the said “set-apart” day, I somehow end up still doing something that’s related to the kids or the house.

Let’s take this particular Tuesday, for example. Supposedly after my class (oh! I forgot to tell you, I went back to the class I enrolled in when I was still pregnant with Mika—dressmaking! I might tell you more about it one of these days *teehee*) ….after class I was supposed to read on books other than parenting books before having dinner with one of our campus workers. Instead, I ended up making a list of activities that I plan to do with Alyanna and Mika this week.

It’s all good, though…I feel very fruitful already (hehe) :)

The rest of the night went as planned:

* Dinner with Ethel— our beautiful, hardworking, and still single campus worker (wait, why am I putting emphasis on single?? no guy can read this naman!…hmm force of habit maybe?). It refreshes me to listen to other ladies who have such a great heart for people. :)

* Music Ministry Training— exciting to see our volunteers who not only make themselves available, but are also very teachable.

* Chat with some of the volunteers— I am looking forward to getting to know more of them :)

Now, I’m here waiting for Dennis as he wraps up his meeting with the pastoral staff of Greenhills.

Again, I find myself staring at this picture:

*sigh* I can’t wait to get home and kiss them!!!

Some days I wish my M&M days were longer, but on this particular day, it’s just not that way…

PS: Sorry. I might have deceived some of you into thinking this blog was about our beloved brand of milk chocolate. Maybe some other blog… :)

I am reposting this note written by our friend David. I am amazed at this young man’s wisdom–it is well beyond his years and his experience. I am sure a lot of couples have a lot to learn from this single guy (hopefully, single not for long David!).

“Faithfulness is not not-cheating. Not cheating is not cheating. We cannot define a principle by what it is not. Faithfulness is being firm in allegiance. In other words, being faithful is more than not cheating, it means being completely devoted. And unfaithfulness is not just cheating, it is not being completely devoted.

And what is devotion? It is simply the dedication of our lives to a purpose – or to a person.

My prayer is not that I won’t be unfaithful. My prayer is that I will be firm in my devotion.”

This is my prayer, too— to be completely devoted and to be firm in my devotion…first to God, then my husband, and then the rest of my family. This means that my choices should reflect these priorities. This means that the way I choose to handle my time, the way I live each day, the manner in which I serve and relate to my husband, how I conduct myself whether or not I am in front of my kids…even the thoughts that I allow to run through my head, and the emotions I allow myself to feel— all these should be aligned to this devotion that I say I have towards them.

If more husbands and wives understand faithfulness in this light, wow there will surely be less counseling cases, less fights, less talk on divorce…and a lot of better marriages and more kids who are secure in their families.

Lord, help me to be totally devoted to you. May you always be my first love….and let your unconditional love overflow through me, to those around me. As I devote the rest of my life to knowing and experiencing more of you, and as I look to you and fix my eyes on you, may you continually teach me and show me more and more how it is to love and respect my husband, and to train and shepherd my children.

:)

I was having dinner with another mom last weekend and we got into the following conversation:

ME: “So how do you spend most of your day?” (I know this mom is involved in their business)

MOM: “Work talaga. My whole day is spent at the office.”

ME: “Wow! Kaya mo? Good for you! Galing mo naman.” (Seriously, I admire moms who are able to manage work plus mommy-hood. My hat’s off to you!)

MOM: “Yeah, kaya naman. I manage. What about you?”

ME: “Well, most of my days are really spent at home with the kids.”

MOM: “As in, housewife ka lang talga???” (she knows that I am a full-time homemaker, yet she still seemed surprised at my answer)

ME: “Yep!” *grin*

MOM: (in a seemingly puzzled tone) “So you cook everyday??”

ME: “Not really everyday. When I cook, I take a lot of time in the kitchen so I choose to cook on some days only or especially when there’s an occasion or when we’re having guests over.”

MOM: (even more puzzled this time) “Ha?? So that’s it?? The WHOLE day you’re just at home??? What do you do?? As in, with the kids lang the WHOLE day???”

…….and then I shall stop here. (I gave her an answer, but let me stop my story here.)

I must warn you that some of what will follow this sentence might be inappropriate or not what should have entered my mind but I choose to be honest with you. Here were the thoughts that ran through my mind at that time: (Don’t worry, they didn’t linger in my mind long enough for me to be affected :D )

Lang? …my husband never added that word in reference to what I do around the house.”

“She’s a mom, too….seriously? Does she really not understand how it is to stay home with the kids and manage a household?”

“Gosh…now that you put it that way, it does sound like my days are so unfruitful.”

“Note: I have to ask Dennis again about this, about how he really feels about me not working and being a stay-at-home mom.”

——-—and then I took my thoughts captive (see? I told you not to worry!)——-

I realized that there really will be people who will see what we stay-at-home moms do as a “waste” (for lack of a better word) of talent, brains, and skill (now, there’s a consolation: at least they all have the presumption that we are talented, smart, and skillful! :D ). The  tricky thing about motherhood is, unlike a career or a job where you get paid for what you do and you see immediate tangible rewards for your efforts at the end of a day’s work, we don’t get that kind of satisfaction even if we wanted to. In any job– you work, you have an output, you get paid. You do an exceptional job, you get a promotion. All the time and energy you put into your work become evident almost all the time, often right away.

On the other hand, moms do a lot of overtime work, but don’t get paid. The immediate tangible products of our day’s efforts  are usually in the form of arts and crafts and messy rooms. The rewards we get are in the form of smiles, hugs, and kisses (this I don’t get as often since my four-year old doesn’t like the thought of saliva transference). If we do an exceptional job, we get the satisfaction of knowing we gave it our best. The product of all the time and energy we put into our work sometimes become evident, but too often we have to wait.

….and we wait years….until we see our children grow up. We wait years before we see the real fruit of all our efforts, years before all the hard work pay off. But we have this promise that as we train up our children in the way they should go, in the end they will not depart from it (Proverbs 22:6).

Motherhood is an investment with high risks. That’s because the stakes are high– we are dealing with lives.

But it is also one with the highest returns and the greatest rewards. :)

Do you remember those days when you and your husband were still dating? Didn’t it feel like your husband was the most creative person when it came to surprising you and making you feel special? You, too, were probably very inspired in your efforts to come up with ways to make your man feel very important.

Dennis gave himself an assignment this year: to come up with more creative ways to date me. I must admit I am pretty low maintenance in the sense that any place with great food or a lovely ambiance would really do the trick for me. Or just the thought of  my husband having a plan to take me somewhere or do something for me already makes me excited. I’m sure most of you are low maintenance in this respect too. Especially once we have kids, the mere thought of someone thinking about us–our needs and our desires– is enough to make our day. When our husbands show that they see us and what’s in our hearts, we can go through everything and anything and still smile.

In a way this is a good thing. Actually, it really is a good thing. But it is also because of this that we have to be more deliberate in retaining that creativity and ingenuity that we once had when we were dating. As husbands, it is so easy to forget the need to go out of your way and do something for your wives, especially since too often wives are not vocal about their inner wishes and desires. Besides, we all know that our wives will not really love us any less if we fail to be more creative, right? Likewise, it is also easy for us wives to come to a conclusion that our husbands will continue to love us even if we fail to put extra imagination in  fulfilling his needs and wants. After all, just as we don’t demand anything out of this world from our husbands, and since we are doing a good-enough job in running the household and taking care of our kids, we’re sure that they are pretty happy with the way things are,right?

Well, those assumptions could be right. Things might be okay between the two of you. Maybe some might even say that things are going great for them. I’d say, “well done.” Good for you. :) Truly, I am happy for you, and I’d really believe you with all my heart when you say that. I do know that your marriage could work if things were this way.

…But I also know that there is always room for some improvement and that it won’t hurt to try to be more creative from time to time. :)

This would be my assignment for myself, too: to let the right side of my brain work more, and to be inspired and imaginative in my efforts as I fulfill my duties as wife, homemaker, and mom.

Lord, help me . :D

I’m back from our mini-getaway and wouldn’t you know it, the kids are fine! :)

The best thing I like about these little set-apart times is that we go back to our kids as closer partners and (hopefully) better parents.

It really doesn’t hurt to try to get out of the house once in a while. Again, we have to remember that one of the best gifts we can give our kids is a strong marriage and the security that mom and dad love each other and are committed to each other. We need to have a mindset that the times we spend away from our kids to date our spouses are investments we make that would have implications not just in our lifetime as parents, but would have an impact on how our kids would see and live life, and how they in turn would build their families and raise the next generation.

Moms and dads, I implore you…. if there is any way that you can leave the kids with someone you trust so both of you can spend some time alone, by all means, get out of that house! :)

In about an hour i shall be unplugging myself from the internet to spend two days of bliss with my husband. No kids, no housework, no ministry work….just me and my best friend, hanging out and enjoying each other’s company. Thank you Carlo for the gift! :D

Ever since we got married, the one thing that Dennis would have to give me that would really hit the mark and make my day was time together. Okay, wait…I wasn’t being completely true to myself there….of course, food also makes the top of my list….but yes, still coupled with quality time with him. This is my primary love language (how I receive and give/show love) –TIME. It’s so hard to pull me away from people I love once I’m spending time with them. Of course, it is a given that in the current season I and my friends are in, it is quite a feat just to set a schedule when we could meet, but once we’re there…good luck to our husbands in their attempts to make us stop and go home. :)

Next to time comes TOUCH. Here is a request that Dennis has become accustomed to: “Love, hug please.” …. I know how hard it is for my husband (and men in general) to stop what they are doing and go over to the wifey just to give a hug. To men, unless that hug would lead to something else, it might not be worth all the effort. It’s all part of their wiring, I think…very result-oriented. But through time, Dennis has come to understand that it is ultimately for his own happiness that he forgo his natural inclination to want to finish whatever work he has to do right away and come give me at least a ten-second hug. As they say, happy wife=happy life. :D

Fortunately for me, Dennis happens to have the exact same love language that he responds well to–  time and touch. :) This makes it relatively easier to be consistent in our efforts to please each other and make each other feel loved….relative being the operative word here. Being consistent is not often associated with the word easy. Being consistent in how we treat our spouses especially after years of being together would require much effort, a lot of reminder, and even more grace. But our hope is that as we continually remind ourselves to speak our spouse’s love language, we reap the rewards of having a happy husband or wife….which would also translate to having a blissful life together. :)

Going back to our mini-getaway, don’t you think it’s about time you and hubby get some time off from the kids, too? :)

Go on! Book that hotel!! Get in that car!!

PS: I’m excited! :D

WARNING: This post might gross some of you out, but this story made me laugh so…. *read at your own risk*

Alyanna: “Mom! Mom! Can I eat banana so that my poo-poo will become long?”

Me: *laughing at the “logic”* “Ha? What??”

(Okay, let me pause here for a minute, for the sake of some, let’s change little poo’s name to p–p– okay?)

Alyanna: “Yes, please mom? because Amah (her grandma) said that if I eat banana my p–p– will become longer and it’s nice to have a long  p–p–”

Me: *thinking, wow. seriously?? that’s a concern to you??* …(i just laughed)

Alyanna: *still serious* “Mom, please? I want a long p–p–. Just like when I went to Achie Bianca’s (her cousin) house and I made poo (oops! sorry, slip of the fingers) p– there, and she looked and said “wow! Alyanna you’re p–p– is so malaki!!” (at this point she gives a huge grin of pride in her so-called accomplishment) …and I want it to always be like that. please mom?”

Me: (Still laughing) “Okay, Alyanna. If that’s what you want, then go ahead and eat banana!”

I’m sorry, I know I should have taken her seriously, but it was too funny for me. What a concern my daughter has! Maybe I should start to give her more responsibilities around the house… ??? :D

For the past few weeks, I have been lacking sleep because of calls from friends who are having some trouble in their marriages. I think since the start of this love month, a lot of my nights have been spent meeting with some of the wives, telling dennis to call some of the husbands, inviting some to come over our house to de-stress, taking calls in the middle of the night, listening to fights, you get the picture. Please don’t get me wrong— I am not, in any way, complaining. I love being able to help in any way I can, even if it means just listening or being there for someone who needs a shoulder to cry on, or taking on the form of a sounding board to pour their hearts out to. Most of the time I don’t even have any suggestions or answers, I just listen and cry or pray with them. The thing is, even if I do get physically, emotionally, and mentally tired from all this, it does have its own way of refreshing me, knowing God has placed me where I am, not to become comfortable, but to be used by God in whatever way He wants to. In the whole process, I myself am learning a lot from everything I’m witnessing, and I am being reminded of basic things we learn in marriage seminars that we so easily forget once we become part of the marriage picture. I also get reminded of what really matter in life, and to always keep my perspective and priorities in check.

I think it’s fair to say that a majority of this love month’s time has been directed towards dealing and thinking about love issues. Is it something in the air?? …Thank God my kids don’t mind sharing their bedroom and sharing their mom’s time with others (so far, at least). :) This is why I will probably be directing my blogs toward marriage/relationship issues and husband-and-wife concerns in the coming days. My blogs are supposed to reflect my thoughts, after all,  right? And I must admit that the past few days, relationships have been foremost in my mind.

There….I just wanted to give you the heads up. No promises, though. I’m just saying I think that for now, this is what I would feel like writing about. :)